I finally had to ask you for money again. Korena says her account is negative after I got the last of my truck sale money, and the carrier has suspended me so I can't get cash advances.
I closed out my best pass account, which had a positive balance. I'm guessing I might get 140 there and a 100.00 balance some time after they get their device back (can't mail it from here). But I can't count on that money. The guy in the finance dept said I didn't return a device from 2009. I don't know what he's talking about. But they might deduct that.
I called the Salvation Army and two other charities. On referrals, I called a local church. Community Action Center.
I got some homeless shelters that I can't get to and would require me to leave what's left of my belongings.
The timeline on my truck is fuzzy. I could get it tomorrow. More likely it will become available then and I won't get it til next week.
I haven't gone to the bar at all, so I can still eat today and make one more deposit tomorrow, at which point I'll be utterly destitute.
I could have waited a little longer to ask you, but couldn't stand the uncertainty and fear any longer. That's why I said I need 200 but asked for 400 if you could do it.
I spent 40 hours in this room just now. There's nothing else for me to do. I had bought a 4.50 foot long the day before and had peanuts left over so I didn't have to make a food run.
My budget is tomorrow's 45.00 deposit and 10.00 (maybe 12.50 with change).
If you help me out one last time, I can pay through Tuesday and indulge myself to the first half of Thursday night football at the bar. Then I can sleep.
I haven't been able to sleep. I try to distract myself from my worries with this kindle and tv. I'm watching a season of falling skies I missed most of on the kindle. I tried to watch this "earth fall" movie Amazon produced, but it was indescribably horrifically bad.
I am doing fantasy, but only a few quarters and the free tournaments (I can win tickets to real contests that way).
Right now I'll go get some tea at the truck stop. I brought my teabags with me so it's free. And ill get another bag of peanuts.
Those are 2.00 for a big bag, in the shell. I eat some of the shells to scrub my guts, and like cracking them open.
I've become addicted to that cop series where Tom sellick is the police commissioner and the other walberg brother is his son and a detective and stuff, but I'm hitting reruns now.
Anyhow I hope you realize I'm not bullshooting about my changed situation here. That is, that I won't have to pay for any repairs from now on, so you can quit worrying about safes dropping on me again.
You'll still have to be patient about my debt. I have to take care of Korena, my Corporate filing, my next phone bill, my mailbox rental, George (who has his own problems), build up a modest war chest, then I can pay you in large chunks.
I remember, when I bought my first truck. I had been with USA as a company driver for two years, then doing lease-to-own at Central Hauling for one.
Because I didn't have to pay my massive maintenance account deficit at central, I had 40,000.00 to buy the truck and APU right there.
As a company driver now, I can save that kind of money again.
But right now...HEEELLLPPPP!
Well here it is Monday and no 200. They dragged it out til Friday, with Mac the hotel guy accepting deposits on the weekly from me til I ran out of money.
On Friday Korri's husband had a heart attack (not his first) and went into surgery. She dropped everything to be with him. Kate was on the road to attend a funeral.
I couldn't exactly keep pestering Korri with that going on, and I'm worried about the guy myself.
Kate said she couldn't do anything til she got back in the office.
Based on their most recent bashing of me, neither of them think I give a damn about anybody but myself despite my well-intended email.
Plus, Korena is making me a company driver for her. She was expecting me to argue with her, as she had a sort of sales presentation prepared, but it's ok with me.
I half expected it, since she has to pay for my plates whether it's a loan or not, refile everything with the carrier, etc.
I believe she pays tolls, and she does pay maintenance. I'm not sure about my per-mile rate, but it should be decent. She will also pay fuel and truck washes.
I won't gross anywhere near what I did before, but my net will be decent. I can't get any deeper in the hole. Ill run the same loads.
I don't know if my volvo 670 will have an i-shift, but it's got 405,000 miles so it should be around 350,000 miles away from serious troubles, and the tires look new.
I owe att, plus my resident Nevada corp. agent, plus my mailbox rental--all way overdue, and the fiscal year will end in a couple weeks. The rent will keep me til wednesday.
When she called (before the heart attack) she wasn't angry anymore. That was Thursday night, and she said at that time that Kate would get me the 200 Friday.
As I predicted, it got dragged out. Kate just forgot or something. She texted she was sorry she'd been working on my truck.
It's always like this, for whatever reason. I'm rarely allowed to feel secure or comfortable. There is always something overdue, and something else I'm waiting for and have to keep begging for and worrying about. I sold the truck over 2 weeks ago, and I'm still trying to get the last 200 of the thousand I asked for! Always. Every time.
As a company driver I won't have to go through that any more. Korena will probably put me on a 500/week limit until she has her own money back.
She's not as bad as Kate, and knows I've got a bunch of overdue bills to pay. She'll be paying my corporation, which will be paying those bills. I as an individual will work for free until those bills are paid.
I will still hit hotels when I can, and that will be on me unless I'm down for repairs. I don't know if Korri will pay then.
I get the railroad meal allotment deduction of around 50.00/day...getting in the weeds here.
A little later, ill send an email suggesting she take over my existing Best pass (toll) account. I have a positive balance with them, and she could deduct that off what I owe her.
But for now, I'm still biting my nails to the quick and sleeping only intermittently and worrying and stressing over unpaid rent and my next meal and Korri's husband and once that bill is paid ill go to the bar to watch the first half of Monday night football to see if the few fantasy lottery tickets I have left alive will salvage anything from my disastrous weekend.
My apologies to Andy Dalton for his mangled thumb. That was THEM.
I will be an owner-operator again, but it might take a long time. This truck won't have a refrigerator or APU. She won't let me modify it in any significant way. If it doesn't have an i-shift, I won't want to buy it anyway.
Pressed for time, I left a lot of stuff in the truck. I forgot some important tools. I got my clothes and bedding and electronic devices, but I'll have to buy some stuff as soon as I have two nickels to rub together.
But the future looks somewhat better for now as a company driver. I will certainly make a lot more than I did with old leaky cranky old mantruck, and when I do need repairs she won't waste time paying for those and getting me out of there, and I won't owe her for them.
For you, it means I'm ok. It's not my truck. I can't get in big trouble.
Now it's time to wait for Mac to knock on my door asking why he hasn't been paid yet.
Update: My phone is cut off for nonpayment. I emailed Korena/Kate using hotel WiFi. "Call your brother. I'm at the hospital and I'm not leaving. Kate is at her father in law's funeral."
So I emailed our brother G again. Asked for the 97.00 past due for att and 100 for the hotel (so I could get some money back in my pocket-- Mac would give me part of the cash I'd paid back).
What a ridiculous situation. As the girls keep telling me over and over and over again I should be grateful and they don't owe me anything. Why couldn't they have just got the whole thousand to me, or at least the last 200 of it, by Wednesday, or Thursday, or Friday? Why do they always do this to me?
Now you have company. I've stuck G behind the 8-ball, and assuming he helps it will hurt him now, as Christmas approaches.
I can't stand this. This is hell. Why why why?
I never got the last 300 of the 1000 I stipulated. I was hoping to just let Korri keep it, but the new truck is taking longer than we'd hoped.
A couple nights ago, I knew it would bleed into next week, so I emailed, and made the mistake of putting "I'm a person too" in the subject line.
I was trying to walk on eggshells, and be diplomatic about it. I explained that I had hoped not to ask for anything more, but now needed it for a weekly rent which would save me over 100.00. I said I'd need it by yesterday, when I was due to get kicked out again.
They both blasted me. I was trying to make Korena feel guilty. I was a crybaby. I should be grateful.
See I made the additional mistake of wallowing in empathy and gratitude in the email, since all I hear from them is "because of you" and "I don't think you do" so I got all sappy.
It doesn't matter , what I say or do or try to do. Kate literally despises me. I've never experienced that much hatred from another human being, including my boxing days and my 2.5 years as a c.o.
So yesterday I got 100.00. Korena said that Kate would take care of me today.
Didn't happen. And as I predicted in my email, I had to beg for the remaining 200 again today.
And I KNEW it would be like this when I didn't get the whole 1000 last week. Getting the rest would be like pulling teeth, and it would come down to 2 more days of Raman noodles followed by a near eviction before I...
Crap this has been my life. Yeah ok I'm whining again and I owe her and she's doing a ton of stuff for me but what do I do Rob a bank? What choice do I have huh? I'm at the food and shelter level and have to fight for even the crumbs left over from my truck.
She needs me to get her money back, and when my truck was running I was probably her best producer/financial asset. If I ever suggested that to her she'd tell me I was average, just out of reflex-just to keep me in my place.
She said she'd get the 200 put on my card tomorrow morning. I said "ok tx". She responded "sure", instead of "welcome". Like I'm not really grateful. Jesus (not a curse-an appeal).
Freaking Chinese water torture.
Well once I get running again Korena will like me again, and Kate will downgrade her hatred to disdain eventually.
The hotel guy accepted a deposit and will work with me. I hope that tomorrow come 11:00 I don't have to beg and get insulted again, but reckon I will. And it will probably be only 100, so I get to look forward to some more of that Monday.
Yeah try to sleep at night with that shit.
Korena said she'd get me a truck "by the end of the week". Kate paid 300 of the hotel bill and they got me 400. I prepaid for a weeks rent, so he won't kick me out.
I loaded up on nuts and chips. The gas station next door has 1.00 hot dogs and Arthur Treachers has a 2.00 fish and chip deal.
Our younger brother, who I called when I thought I was getting evicted (for a ride or something...I don't know I'd just been stomped on for telling them they blew the wire transfer and I was screwed).
I got his machine but he texted me back. I told him what was up, but that I was now out of immediate danger of homelessness.
But damn if he didn't pay 200.00 of my 290.00 AT&T bill!
They gave me til the 10th for the balance, but I think I can push that back later.
Since a truck might have to be brought to me, perhaps from hundreds of miles away, I'm not asking for the other 300.00 yet.
It will occur to Korena, I know, to use it and break the news to her dumbass selfish driver who never thinks about anybody but himself and is ungrateful and has caused her all kinds of problems.
She will steel herself for a big fight, be surprised when she doesn't get one, and promptly forget the entire exchange.
Yesterday I paid zero for food. If I was willing to live on peanuts, Fritos, and cookies I could go 2 more days, but I'll get 2 Chile dogs or some fish and chips later.
I'm not going to behave, though. I'm going to a bar to watch maybe the first half of Thursday night football.
I've been treading water in fantasy, and have some guys playing tonight.
I never spend over 20 bucks. It's the one bad thing I do, maybe every second or third day. I meet some nice people. I stay sane.
"By the end of the week" often means Monday. Korena owns some trucks, and might put me in one of hers temporarily. But there's all sorts of paperwork to do thanks to oppressive regulations.
I hooked her back up with Chris at National Leasing, and hope he can pull off another near miracle and lease her a truck I'll actually want to keep and eventually rebuild.
She'd have to lease to own it, since my name is mud thanks to the Nazis, and I'd have to sign a separate contract with her obliging me to make the payments etc. (And of course to take the title once it's paid off).
Korena is a good person and doesn't really hate me. But she also needs me.
Until I've repaid the carrier, all her commissions are being withheld. She hasn't been paid for several weeks. This is over and above the money I still personally owe her, which by this time is insignificant in comparison.
As Kate keeps telling me, that's not fair. But it is what it is, and she will get me rolling as soon as she can.
But Ryder and Penske want big deposits, then 500+/week, then mileage pay, and she can't do that.
Chris, I believe, can. But he'll need her credit and banking information, and have to wade through the same swamp of bullshit, and then the carrier bullshit for ifta, insurance, etc. And I haven't paid my road taxes yet (another reason I'm playing dumb. I CAN'T pay them! She'll have to! Unless...I'm not certain-the plates could be from another state, so maybe I could pay them later. Not sure how that works. Just that if I got new Ohio plates I'd have to pay first...)
Either way, it's 550.00 I must pay. Plus late penalties. I just hope I can wait a month or so while running under somebody else's plates.
Oh yeah, well see when you lease to own the plates are often in the name of the leasing company. The costs of them and road taxes are part of the lease payments, so the lessee does pay over time.
Well if you happen to read this root for Chris and the last truck I'll need.
Read this:
First of all let's get one thing straight. YOU'RE AN ADULT AND IT''S NOT KORENA RESPONSIBILITY TO TAKE CARE OF YOU! SHE HAS GONE WAY ABOVE HER DUTY. THE MONEY WAS TRANSFER. YOU OWE KORENA A LOT OF MONEY. AS SOON AS I KNOW MORE FROM TD BANK I WILL LET YOU KNOW.
KATE
Nothing I say or do matters. Not the 3,000.00. Not the fact that they wired the money to the wrong account and put me in this jam.
Over and over again, I'm told I'm an ingrate, it's all my fault, I don't understand (call me Corky), and an itemized list (long since seared indelibly onto my brain) of all the trouble I have so selfishly and thoughtlessly caused.
Below is what Kate was responded to. I wrote it after getting screamed at by Korena for telling her that I was about to get kicked out of the hotel.
-----Original Message-----
Subject: Situation
Etrade does not accept wires from nonlinked accounts so the wire is doa.
I'll need it in an efs check now, I'm out of time. Mac the hotel guy will kick me out at 2:30 I'll be homeless.
I told Att I'd pay them my delinquent and current bills on the second and will probably get shut down.
I understand and appreciate what you've done for me and what I owe you. You don't understand that I am on the verge of homelessness and can't even buy food.
Remember: I had the money wired to her because I knew she was in trouble on my behalf. Kate (her sister) is only a little more impervious to the reason I didn't just direct the whole 4 grand to myself than Korena is, because I get this bashing from both of them.
