More of the same

The rental company won't accept cash and requires a non-profit credit card.  

They're sending me a money order for 300.00.

She's talking about a bus or a plane again.  There are no stations or airports anywhere near here.

Korena just called and wasn't a bitch.  She might come get me and take me to a bus/train station or airport.  

That's not as bad for her as it would have been for you.  I was considering an emergency contingency: you bring me back to Cleveland and I get on a bus there.  A plane would work better but I have my GPS thing and wires and plugs and stuff they might not let me take.

Korena said if she comes and gets me she can take the bulk of my stuff back to Delaware with her.

That's ideal since I have to go there with the truck anyway, and can pick it all up without wasting time and miles.

The money order which won't get here before Friday means I'm here til at least Sunday.

That's fine since I'm still limping/healing my ankle.

Anxiety kept me up all night again.  It gets intense when I'm about to make a move and expect something to go wrong again.  My brain won't shut down.  I guess my subconscious perceives a threat.

Korena shouldn't have so much power over me, but the calm, reasonable way she spoke to me was reassuring.

I must confess that I was still thinking about the easy way out.  For the rest of my life now, it will always be there for me.

But I feel better now.  I know that with you and G, I'm not really alone, but for awhile felt not only alone, but despised and abandoned.

If I had known this stuff would take so long, I would have been looking for work on my second or third day here.  I am lazy, but hate owing anybody anything, begging for money, feeling helpless and dependant.  I would have worked to avoid it.

But I was supposed to be out of here and in a new truck any time now, so what was I supposed to do?

Anyway, I didn't go to the bar last week like I said I might, but might this time.  Maybe Saturday.

Korena even asked me about that, and assumed (and accepted) that I had.

Yeah this was Good Korena.  Like I said, she's not really evil.  

If she comes and gets me, I'll have a rare opportunity to talk to her in person.  This is when I will ask her all the questions I need to ask her.  She can't turn it into a fight face to face, or say "gotta go" and hang up.  All she can do is try to change the subject.

Anyway, the wheels are starting to turn.  I see a glimmer of light.  You have been a big part of that.